> ## Content Index > Fetch the complete content index at: https://adamringler.com/llms.txt > Use this file to discover other available public pages before exploring further. # #033 The Lessons from Introverts and Extroverts - URL: https://adamringler.com/podcast/033/ - Published: 2019-02-05T14:00:00.000Z - Updated: 2026-10-20T03:58:47.000Z - Description: In this episode of the Decoding Excellence Show, I am sharing many of the lessons you can apply from introverts and extroverts in the coaching world. - Author: Adam Ringler - Tags: Decoding Excellence, #podcast, Coaching and Leadership In this episode of the Decoding Excellence Show, I am sharing many of the lessons you can apply from introverts and extroverts in the coaching world. So often, we put labels on people that they are either an introvert OR an extrovert; but the reality is that we are often both. Inside this show, I discuss a few of the qualities that each counterpart brings to the coaching world and why it is important to try to strengthen our opposite communication persona. My hope is that you leave this show with a greater understanding of the value that the opposite communication style brings to the table. As always, thank you for supporting **The Decoding Excellence Show**! In addition to those social mediums, you can head over to [AdamRingler.com/Newsletter](http://www.adamringler.com/newsletter?ref=adamringler.com) and sign-up for my weekly newsletter. This is a newsletter for the curious. It's chalked full of interesting articles I've read through the week, things I'm exploring and finding fascinating through my week, and a collections of thought experiences and resources I've cultivated. It's essentially a Birchbox for performance-related articles and musings. If you are looking to help grow and support the Decoding Excellence show, navigate over to [Buy Me a Coffee](https://www.buymeacoffee.com/AdamRingler?ref=adamringler.com). Buy Me A Coffee is a an easy & fun way to support the show. For the price of a Grande Latte ☕ you can support the show and help us maintain the quality of the content. One hundred percent of the contributions go directly to supporting the hosting fees associated with operating this podcast. If any of the material resonates with you, I'd love for you engage with me at [@AdamRingler](https://www.twitter.com/adamringler?ref=adamringler.com) Thanks again for listening to the Decoding Excellence Show! I appreciate all the support growing this Sport Science, Strength & Conditioning, and High-Performance Coaching resource. If you have taken anything away from the show, please login to iTunes and navigate to [Decoding Excellence](https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/decoding-excellence/id1205636566?mt=2&ref=adamringler.com) page and leave us a review. --- ## Key Takeaways - Most coaches are a mix of introvert and extrovert, not one or the other, despite the labels we use. - Each communication style brings distinct qualities to the coaching world that are worth understanding. - Work on strengthening your opposite communication persona; it makes you a more complete coach. ## Listen and Subscribe Find this episode of the Decoding Excellence Show on [Apple Podcasts](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/decoding-excellence/id1205636566?ref=adamringler.com) and [Spotify](https://open.spotify.com/show/093GVrPwd9l832q3EWhVKc?ref=adamringler.com), or use the player above. --- ## Go Further in This Episode Enjoyed this conversation? Here is how to get more from it: - **Read the transcript below** to revisit key ideas at your own pace. - **Share this episode** with a coach or colleague who would benefit. - **Subscribe to the Decoding Excellence Show** on [Apple Podcasts](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/decoding-excellence/id1205636566?ref=adamringler.com), [Spotify](https://open.spotify.com/show/093GVrPwd9l832q3EWhVKc?ref=adamringler.com), or your favorite app. - **Join the newsletter** at [adamringler.com/newsletter](https://adamringler.com/newsletter/) for weekly insights on human performance. --- ## Episode Transcript *This transcript was automatically generated. While we strive for accuracy, some words or phrases may be misheard.* \[00:00:00\] Sport science, strength and conditioning, high performance coaching, welcome to the Coating Excellence Show. \[00:00:54\] It is essentially the birch box of newsletters, you don't know exactly what you're going to get week-to-week, month-to-month but what you can guarantee is that it's going to be chucked full of good things. Head over to AdamRingler.com forward slash newsletter, pop in your email and sign up today. You will not regret it and I won't spam you with 8 million different emails every week, every day, every month. So check it out, AdamRingler.com forward slash newsletter. Secondly, I get emails and messages every single publication talking about how can we support the Decoding Excellence Show and the mission that you're bringing to us. And the easiest way is buy me a coffee. \[00:01:38\] No, don't actually physically buy me a coffee. Head over to buymeacoffee.com forward slash AdamRingler. And there you can find in an easy donation way. You can pop in your information and you could essentially buy the show a coffee, a $5 latte if you will. And what we'll do with that is those proceeds from that donation will go immediately into the hosting fees for both the website and the Decoding Excellence Show. So we can continue to bring this show to you via iTunes, Spotify, whatever podcast player of your choice. So check it out, buymeacoffee.com forward slash AdamRingler. Hey everybody, on this week's episode of the Decoding Excellence Show, I'm going to be discussing some of the differences in coaches that might be more naturally introverted versus extroverted and what we can learn from each other in this episode. \[00:02:35\] How can we apply some of the behaviors, some of the tactics, some of the techniques that naturally are opposite counterparts do. So whether you're an introvert listening to the show quietly away from a group, away from everybody else with your hood up and your headphones in or you're naturally an extrovert, what can we learn from each other to really try to make our conversations or connections and our ability to relate and connect with other athletes and coaches better in the new year. So without further ado, here is my episode of the Decoding Excellence Show talking about introverts and extroverts and what we can learn from each other. Hey everybody, welcome to this week's Decoding Excellence Show. We have a great one for you because this week, much like we said in the intro, we're going to discuss some of the things, some of the differences between coaches on the floor, whether you're an introvert or extrovert, how you can maybe apply the skill set from the other half regardless of whether you're an introvert. There's lessons to be learned from extroverts or if you're vice versa, if you're naturally an extrovert that loves the social scene and can hold a conversation with anybody, then what can you learn from the introverts? So I thought I would start the show just by simply maybe making a confession. I am naturally, despite having a podcast show and sharing some publications online, I'm probably an introvert and I say probably loosely, I definitely, definitely am. It's how I recharge. \[00:04:16\] It's what I do to get my energy back is to have quiet more solo time to reflect and to essentially recharge, which might be very different than sort of my work persona where I think by nature, leading people and certainly leading people through like conditioning sessions that it just is a benefit, I think to be more extroverted to be able to create some of that dynamic in atmosphere in that environment. But certainly 51% of the time versus 49%, I am more of an introvert, but I can turn it on and turn it off regardless of where we're at. And I say all this because having moments where I am probably more naturally introverted and moments where I have to be more extroverted, there's lessons that we can learn from each other. And that's what the nature of the show this week is I wanted to discuss some of the things I've seen in a strength conditioning perspective of what we can learn from each other. I thought the first thing we would start off with is that extroverts can learn to listen like the introverts, right? And I think that's something that introverts have always had a maybe a leg up on our extrovert counterparts is because we've always had a strong listening ability or an observational skills. \[00:05:52\] And I think sometimes extroverts have a tendency of wanting to run away with the conversation and they're so engaged in it and they're so dynamic that sometimes as a result of that, they failed to listen. And I think so much of human communication and our ability of making connections and listening to other people is really understanding other people is built around effective listening. So my recommendation to extroverts would be to take a step back and really try to invest more in listening than in actually carrying the conversation, which can be hard for each respective counterpart to do. And what can introverts do? What can we do a little bit better? Well, we can learn to make conversations better and that is socializing or conversational skills probably doesn't come naturally for most introverts. And so just by simply recognizing in our counterparts sort of what their strengths are, we can start to understand how to make more small talk with call workers. How to relate to other people and even though that might mean stepping outside your comfort zone, that's a huge part of what we do is to not only make connections with people. \[00:07:15\] Yeah, we need to listen and we need to connect with them and understand them deeply. But we also need to be able to have some conversational icebreakers and make some small talk. So I would challenge my introvert counterparts to try to make more small talk to try to not to make more small talk just for simple small talk nature, but to challenge yourself to carry a conversation, to get outside of yourself, to get outside your comfort zone and make those connections. And moving on. So I also think that for our extrovert counterparts, to rather than operating at more of a superficial level, to really try to deepen conversations. So what I mean by that is when you're in a social environment, let's say you're heading out to an SCA coaches conference or CSCCA national conference, rather than just sort of operating at a 30,000-foot view level of a conversation, to rather than having, you know, these micro conversations with everybody being, being, being, you know, being a social butterfly, try to have more meaningful deeper conversations with the few people. And I think that can be a very valuable skill set to develop for our extroverts so that you can, again, you can have deeper conversations, you can form those deeper connections with people. \[00:08:44\] And for our introverts out there who might be listening to the show, you know, try to be a little bit more open-minded, try to be a little bit more daring. So extend yourself, try to do some different things, rather than just seeking out the comfort of the one or two or three coaches or, let's say, you know, ten different coaches, rather than going out to them, go meet some new people, step outside that comfort zone and introduce yourself to other coaches at these, you know, coaches conferences. And, you know, extend your hand, have a handshake and try to meet some people. And that can be very daunting, I think, for both people, right, for both sides of the coin, the introverts that need to step outside their comfort zone and make, you know, new connections in this field and for the extroverts to try to deepen the relationships and the connections that they have with other people. And then maybe lastly, moving on that, you know, I think sometimes extroverts can be so busy in their normal day to day, right, and just because that's sort of how they operate, right, they naturally will, you know, seek out that social connection with other people that as a result of that, you might not prioritize enough time to have more quiet reflection periods of your day. And so I would encourage extroverts to try to get outside of their normal social construct and try to find or create periods of time where you're alone, where you can reflect and you can have maybe a little bit more mindfulness, we again, I feel like every show I talk about mindfulness meditation, but trying to challenge yourself with being alone more and trying to, you know, essentially seek out some of those reflection periods. And for our introverts, maybe trying to think about opportunities where you can get outside of that alone time and lean on the support network of other people. \[00:10:41\] So going out and asking your peers, your co-workers, your counterparts for ideas or help in certain avenues, brainstorming in larger group settings or, you know, going out and putting yourself out in social situations where, you know, might be doing some small group work. Or some leaning on that sort of network. And I think there's such valuable skill sets in each side of the coin. It makes me think of an incredible book by Susan Cain called Quiet, which has goes on essentially as a, you know, a self-confessed introvert in her world, in her work. And goes on to talk a lot about some of the unique qualities that introverts bring into our world. And what she goes on and talks about is that, you know, essentially Western cultures portrays the extroversion as the ideal version of success, that whether you're an introvert or naturally an extrovert that you should no matter what seek that sort of extroversion part of yourself. And there's a part of me that really relates to that, right, especially in coaching, which we have to be energy givers, we have to set the environment, set the temperature as a thermostat of the room, right, metaphorically speaking that we need to bring that energy every single day. And I would challenge that it's very, very difficult to do that as an introvert, to be able to turn that on and create energy and create spark and be dynamic and create that presence as a natural introvert. So I would, while I relate to what, you know, Susan Cain is saying in this, in this book of hers, Quiet, I do think that there is a reason behind it for the coaching world. \[00:12:38\] I definitely think that there's also some benefits of being an introvert, right, if you know how to turn the switch on and off, there's a lot of different things you can do with it, right. You can be able to form those connections with your athletes or with your coaching staff, because you can have those deeper meaningful conversations. But if you flip that introverted sort of switch off and you flip the extroversion one on, right, you can also create that spark in the weight room or spark in that coaching environment that is so desperately needed. So I don't think it's if or, you know, if or and I don't think it has to be a polarizing opposite, you're this or you're that. I think we can harness the best qualities of both, right. You can be an extrovert and an introvert. \[00:13:26\] You need to be able to harness both of those and be able to turn it on, on and off. So if you're an introvert and you don't like small talk, right, I think you're going to miss some of the little moments throughout your day where you can connect with people on a very superficial level that may lead to a deeper, more engaged, profound conversation. But if you never make those simple connections at a superficial level, you'll never get down to that that deeper level as well. And on the vice versa, if you're always operating on that superficial micro level of conversation or macro level conversation, you'll never get into that deeper, engaged connection that may be an introvert would. So is it that you have to be one or the other? Absolutely not. You don't. I think you can be both, right, and I think we need to harness, we need to champion both. \[00:14:21\] When sort of our Western civilization, I don't think that naturally happens. I think a lot of our introverts feel shunned in the workplace and they try to bring themselves out. Extroverts walk in naturally and they're champion already. There's benefits to learning both. Just to wrap up this conversation and this quick micro show, right, our introverts, I think they need to be able to make conversations and hold a conversation like our extrovert counterparts. Our extroverts need to be able to dive in deeper into those meaningful, engaged conversations and make some of those connections that maybe wouldn't otherwise typically would. \[00:15:04\] Our introverts need to be able to get outside of themselves, ask more questions, ask for help and work in smaller teams and working in brainstorm in larger groups and get outside of the one or two or three or small little network that they know and make some new connections with people. Our extroverts need to deepen their already conversations and the connections that they have and go deeper into those. And then lastly, I think again, our introverts need to be able to be comfortable asking for help in other in those capacities. And I think our extroverts need to be able to go in and take the qualities of what our introverts offer and be able to have moments of quiet reflection and really try to recharge their batteries. So again, essentially we're filling buckets that aren't filled. If you're an introvert, look at some of the qualities that our extroverts do and try to extend yourself and challenge yourself to go out, seek those opportunities and try to do those things. \[00:16:05\] If you're naturally an extrovert, look at the qualities our introverts do, the quiet moments of reflection, the deeper conversations, the ability to try to connect on a more one-on-one level. Let's challenge ourselves and challenge yourself to try to add qualities like a ying ying symbol. Add some of the qualities of the opposite counterpart. What doesn't come natural to you? Start to add those qualities and those characteristics and those habits and those behaviors into your day to day, deepen your ability to connect with other people. One way or another, depending on whether you're naturally an introvert or an extrovert, and let's try to extend ourselves to see through the lens of our opposite counterparts. \[00:16:59\] Hey everybody, thanks so much for tuning in to this week's episode of the Decoding Excellence Show. I hope you took something away from this show, right? The discussion on the qualities and the values and the benefits that introverts can bring to the workplace, but also recognizing what our extroverts do incredibly well. And my hope is that throughout this show that you maybe took something away where you can say hey you know what, I need to try to work on that. I need to try to work on creating more meaningful deeper conversations like my introvert counterparts do, or I need to put myself in situations where I extend myself and make some new networks and sort of get outside the comfort zones of the three or four or five or ten people that I might communicate with on a daily basis. There's such a huge benefit to the other side of the coin, and I want to make sure that we approach it by recognizing the values that each counterparts bring and try to challenge ourselves and challenge yourself to doing more of those qualities in this new year. So I really appreciate you guys listening to these micro shows have been getting some great feedback from you. \[00:18:12\] So please continue reaching out sharing this show whether it's on social media or whatever platform of your choice if you take anything away from it. Let me know. I love hearing your guys' feedback. I really get a lot of benefit and value and satisfaction from hearing from you guys about the lessons, about some of the things, about what we talk about on each one of these shows. So reach out to me on social media at Adam Ringler. And as always, there's a number of different ways that you can support the show, right? The first thing is I have a monthly newsletter that goes out. It is located at Adam Ringler dot com forward slash newsletter. And like I said in the intro, it is chocked full of great articles, research papers, sort of daily notes things I'm finding fascinating and experimenting with. And being a human guinea pig with to try to change my own behaviors, my own habits, but ultimately to really try to improve my life and get something a little bit more meaningful out of it. So head over to Adam Ringler dot com forward slash newsletter pop in your email and I promise you you'll get the welcome email and you'll start receiving those monthly updates and you won't regret it. I'm not going to send you a bunch of spam messages or anything like that. I really think that you'll get a lot out of it and and check it out. \[00:19:39\] I get questions every single time we publish either an article or the latest update to the Decoding Excellence Show and the question I often receive is, how do I support this show? Well, we have a new way that the audience and the crowd and everybody else here can support the Decoding Excellence Show head over to buy me a coffee dot com forward slash Adam Ringler. It's actually not buying me a coffee. I know the name sounds sort of confusing or misleading, if you will, but what it is is it's a platform, sort of a crowdsourcing way of donating to the show. And the idea is that you would donate a coffee right $5 for dollars or whatever to the Decoding Excellence show. And what we do with this is we turn the proceeds directly over to supporting the hosting of the Decoding Excellence Show on whether it's on Spotify or on simple cast or iTunes and elsewhere. And it supports the hosting fees for our website and the Decoding Excellence Decoding Excellence Show. So if you want to support the show, you can buy me a coffee, you can buy seven coffees, you buy yourself a coffee. Otherwise, please head over, check it out, it is by me a coffee dot com forward slash Adam Ringler. I'll include it in the show notes. And as always, thank you for supporting the Decoding Excellence show. \[00:21:09\] Thank you.